Reggie Bush, Kim Kardashian and Her Big Boobs are House Hunting

November 5, 2009


In more news that is sure to annoy you more than inform you, Kim Kardashian and her giant breasts are house-hunting along with their boyfriend Reggie Bush, who tries to play football for the New Orleans Saints.

Inside sources tell me they are looking for a place that will match their collective talents, restricting their search to Compton, Harlem, Topeka Kansas and Afghanistan.


NCAA Football: Week 10 Happenings

November 5, 2009

Michael Floyd is back in time for the Navy game

College Football’s Week 10 is approaching, so here are a few things to watch for:

1) Terrell Pryor takes on Penn State, at Penn State. Yawn.

2) Michael Floyd (above) has been cleared to play against Navy after sitting out with a broken collarbone suffered in Week 3 against Michigan State. Watch this guy play, he might actually be better than Golden Tate.  Probably won’t do to much in his first week back though, as (7-1) Pitt looms next on the schedule.

3) Brandon “Prison Rules” Spikes will sit out the entire game against lowly Vanderbilt this week, assumingly to have some time to whittle a shiv out of a toothbrush in preparation for the SEC championship game against Alabama.  Somebody’s gettin’ shanked!


"Anything goes!"

And Now, To Make Up For My Last Post…

November 5, 2009

bar-rafaeli-sexyThe amazing Bar Rafaeli.

I’m sorry about the Mariah Carey thing.  I’ll try to minimize the fat-people-in-bikini pictures from here on out, but I had a chance to insult someone that annoys me….and sometimes that urge is just so hard to resist. 

Now, back to this glorious woman! Oh the things I’d do to you if I could do you…in the 2?

Save the Whales!

November 5, 2009

1257428506_carey-beach-290Mariah Carey doesn’t like being called fat, so I hope she doesn’t stumble across this website and notice that I just called her a beached whale. 

I have a feeling she won’t.  Computers are nearly impossible to use when you are fully submerged in the middle of the Pacific Ocean.

Aw Crap, The Yankees Won

November 5, 2009


The Yankees phinally phinished oph the Phillies last night, much to the dismay of the entire world’s population, except for those few with “Pompadour” hairstyles.

Hot Words! Thursday October 4th!

November 4, 2009
hot words!

Do I actually know what's going on in the world? Let's find out!

1. brandon patch….who the hell is this?
2. sesame street 40th anniversary…kids still love it!
3. honda skydeck concept …not sure, but sounds cool!
4. carly fiorina…probably a mean bitch! 
5. csco…Canadian Shoe Carving Organization? 
6. carrie prejean tape…yes, please!   
7. tropical storm ida…not in my neck of the woods, so no big deal! 
8. casino denies man 166 million jackpot…wtf?
9. tim floyd…the former USC Hoops coach broke up a fight in a casino.  
10. buggery…not sure what it is…but I hope it involves porn!

Really Old Guys To Star In World Series Game 6

November 4, 2009
old people

It’s a battle of aging—I mean “aged”–pitchers tonight in Game 6 of the World Series.

Andy “Old Balls” Pettitte will wheel his way up to the mound and be the first player in Major League history to pitch from a wheelchair, while Pedro “Pampers” Martinez will pitch standing up, but will have aid from a colostomy bag to avoid trips to the bathroom in-between innings.

In other words, I hope you have some good shows DVR’d, because you sure as shit will be bored watchin’ this one!