A Hockey Halloween: Racists and Hotties

November 4, 2009
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Girl on the Right? Yes, Please.

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Patrick Kane (right) debuting his 2nd brilliant PR move of the year.

Yahoo! Sports has some funny/racist/hot pictures of Halloween costumes  that were all related to the NHL in one way or another.

The first picture comes from a St. Louis Blues game, and I want to thank the brunette on the right for attending.  My newly soiled keyboard and monitor will never think of me the same as a result of your excellent fashion sense.

 
The second picture are a couple Blackhawks players, Adam Burish and Patrick Kane.  Kane, as we all know from this summer, helped assault a cabbie in his hometown with his hick cousin.  I guess he thought it’d be smart to top it off by painting himself black and dressing as Scottie Pippen for Halloween.

I don’t necessarily condemn Kane for this as it’s all in good fun, but it just shows how much of a dumbass he is for doing it after the incidents that haunted him no more than 6 months ago.  The media is very sensitive, and therefore, he himself shouldn’t have done it.

One more thing, if Dustin Byfuglien, a black teammate of Kane’s, dressed up in whiteface as Luc Longley  or something and joined in with Kane, then this all would have been seen as universally funny by the media. 

Now here’s another hot broad:

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Please Crash!

November 4, 2009

 

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Sometimes I post stories so non-newsworthy that people wonder why I’m doing it.  I’ll tell you why.  It’s usually because I either think the non-news story contains a girl who’s hotness is worthy of getting a post, or it’s because I post something so annoying I just feel a need to make fun of it.

This is one of those things I just have to make fun of.  People Magazine so bravely reports:

the British-born actor says of his costar, “She’s a unique girl. You really don’t meet many people like Kristen.”

Oh screw off you British tool.  Go buy a comb while you are at it ya goddamned hippie.  This girl is only unique in the fact that she possesses the personality of a lebodomized goat and she always looks stoned. 

I really hope that motorcycle from the picture above is a) moving at 70 mph there and b) headed for a concrete wall with spikes in it. 

These two idiots must be stopped.


This Makes The Syracuse Football Team Look Like World Beaters

November 4, 2009
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LeMoyne Stuns Syracuse

So when I first read the headline this morning that Lemoyne had upset Syracuse, I first thought the football team played on a Tuesday and lost to a one-man team, a guy named LeMoyne. 

Apparently, I was wrong.  It was the no. 25 Syracuse Orangemen’s basketball team that lost to a small school named LeMoyne.  Even more embarassing for the “Cuse, who is predominantly known as a basketball school.

Congrats to LeMoyne, an actual school, not a person.


No News Here, Just One Hot Chick

November 4, 2009

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As evidenced by this picture, Brooklyn Decker  is incredibly gorgeous.  We’re talkin’ huge cans, a beatiful face, long blonde hair and a wonderful fiance.  JUST KIDDING SHE’S ENGAGED TO MOTHERFUCKING ANDY RODDICK PROVING THAT NOTHING IS FAIR IN THIS WORLD EVER. EVER!!

Hopefully she divorces this balding, underachiever tennis (YES TENNIS!) player for a tall, handsome WordPress blogger who creepily types about her big tits and pretty hair from afar.  

See, clearly no real news about her.  If you want news on this girl, try and find some.  I dare you.  BREAKING NEWS: Brooklyn Decker Hot.  Still. 

That’s about all you’ll find, son.  


Dammit, It’s Halloween. Where are all the Sluts?

November 3, 2009
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Fucking Lame.

So some celebrities dressed up for Halloween. Wow.  Big fuckin’ deal.  Not one of these idiots dressed up like a hot slut, so frankly I’m pissed and not quite sure why I’m even linking it. 

What is it with celebrities having such shitty, uninventive costumes, anyway?  I’ve seen more intricate and thoughtful designs put together in Alabama, and they don’t even possess sewing kits, let alone imaginations.

Now, here’s my idea what every able-bodied girl should dress like on Halloween:

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Very Nice, Minus the "I'm Pooping Myself" Facial Expression


50 Ugliest Cars of the Past 50 Years

November 3, 2009
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A Real Clunker!

BusinessWeek’s take on the 50 Ugliest Cars of the Past 50 years

You’ll see a Lambourghini SUV that made the list (pictured below.) That thing was built in 1986, and if you ask me, it looks like some of the stuff coming out today.  Therefore, the design was ahead of its time, and therefore should be taken off the list and put in my driveway.

Lamborghini LM002

Still not a great design or anything, but a lot better than some of the other shit that’s been put out there by other manufacturers.  Ahem, Ford in the 90’s, I’m lookin’ at you.


Holy Sh*t: The Saints are Good

November 3, 2009

Saint Pierre ThomasIn case you didn’t know yet, the Saint are pretty good this year, and they most recently proved that again last night by beating the Falcons on Monday Night Football.

They get turnovers and turn them into touchdowns, have weapons all over the field, and are led by the NFL’s best quarterback, St. Andrew Brees.

Their have no real weaknesses.  I mean, some teams wear light pants so if a player soiled himself, we’d all know.  The Saints even have that covered by wearing the all-black pants every week.  Nice job.